allannathan

Looking ahead to March, things are going to get even crazier.

At Meade Publications, we finally have our new servers installed and running. We finally have hire track working. We’re 99% done with the handbook. We’re 99% done with job descriptions. We’ve re-done the restroom. We’ve re-painted the office. We’re weeding out bad seeds.We’re further fortifying other internal matters.

Even with all this — and this seems to be a common occurrence with GDay as well — it seems to be twice or thrice the amount of work to advance one level up. For the past few years, in my opinion, Dayjob has been at the cusp of getting everything nice and tight, but squandering of certain resources has held us back. For the past few months, Daniel Meade seems like he’s been taking the company and his role in it more seriously. I wanted to type something that gave him less credit, but I often forget that he’s human.

In no way, shape, or form do I envy Daniel Meade’s position. Here’s where I start speculating: One the one hand, there’s a whole other life he could be living with the resources that are invested into Meade Publications. All that money and time invested could be used towards other things he would rather be doing like eating at lavish restaurants, traveling around the world, or buying nice cars. But then there’s the small company he started fifteen years ago that he likes when it’s going well and didn’t want to be around when it wasn’t. It offered some social prestige and recognition and allowed him to be creative, but he couldn’t walk away from it when things got tough or controversial. So things in every area got deferred and deferred because they were time consuming or tough. Now the economy is weaker, and he’s getting more mature. He’s gotten a few yayas out of his system and realized that all those little things that he’s been putting off have snowballed, and he’s the only one that can stop the avalanche. So he’s owning up to it– kind of. There’s still co-mingling of expenses, although less frequently lavish. He’s putting his foot down on bad vendors. He’s putting his foot down with problem employee behavior. He’s getting all those ducks in a row when he’s the only one who can. It’s a monumental task for one human being, because human beings are flawed. We’re not machines. We make mistakes. We have multiple desires — some of which conflict. Running through all the criticisms and speculation about what his motivation is, I often ask myself if this battle will produce anything for me. Daniel Meade is Daniel Meade; he’s taken care of whatever he does with his time and money. I and everybody else in the company, have to choose our battles. As many Ugly Betty moments I’ve had where he does something completely out of left field and then I do something moronic, I do think this is a battle that Meade Publications can win. It’s just that Daniel needs to put in the effort. As long as I see he’s making enough progress and still cares, then I’m in.

Getting back to what’s ahead, I still need to get that gdamn website up and order business cards for the second time. &^%$(&^(%&(*1!!!! Fine. Grin. Bear it. Git er done. Hire Track data needs to be entered. Then there’s the uber influx of CAD requests to pile on top of the infrastructure work. Let’s balance co-design/M.E./programming/subrental duties on top of that, mix in some Ruby programming on top of that, add a layer of sxsw2010, and sprinkle in family and friends where possible, and finally put Boyfriend at the top. Wait. crap. inject personal upkeep somewhere in there; I still need to pay bills, do taxes, and other crap. Voila. It’s an allannathan smorgasborg of idkwtf.

I haven’t been exercising lately. I don’t know whether it’s been because I’m getting lazier or busier or both. On top of that, I’ve been feeling constantly more tense. For this reason, I’m trying to cut down on caffeine and substitute it with a daily after-work gin and cherry limeade.

To finish that brief thought I started with before I went off on those tangents, March is going to be a heck of a month. I’m booked solid, meaning no days off from Mar01 through Mar22. Mar01 thru Mar05 are all-day mixtures of Luma and Ruby. Mar06 thru Mar10 is the Las Vegas Nightclub and Bar Expo. Mar10 thru Mar22 is SXSW. Typing this makes me think I should take a week off afterwards just to spend with Boyfriend. I always look forward to coming home to him; he’s the prize at the end of my daily marathons. Hmm…. I wonder if he’d be interested in coming to Vegas or Austin for a weekend.

I just got done with a heck of a week leading up to a heck of a weekend. mao brought up something that has been a reocurring theme for years. work doesn’t come in consistently. it comes in spurts. you can be slow for three weeks, and all of a sudden, there’ll be one weekend that people want you on five gigs.

such was the case last weekend. freshsf anniversay, president’s day wknd, vday wknd, mardi gras, skills love, spundae anniv. phew.

as with the last three or four skills shows, I walked away knowing I could have done much much more with that rig. there were a lot of layers to play with. at least jay was happy. real happy. that always makes me happy when clients are smiling genuinely.

I’m feeling the wear more ane more from loadig in and programming. there’s always something that needs to be set up or fixed or jushed right before doors, which means I start programming a half hour past doors. I can do both when I comes down to it. I loaded in, teched, progged and operated enough so that everyone (else) was happy. I wasn’t and am not unhappy; I just know I could have done way better.

anyhow, I guess it was good enough. 2010 is looking real good. the regular gigs like konami, sxsw, pop2010, marketlive, loveafterparty, and more are in the works. new business is sprouting too. that reminds me. I’m way overdue for a return call to chuck lightning.

on a separate note, I still need to buy an slr…

I just downloaded the wp app on my droid. this should make for more frequent updates.

Last night was Trademark’s Lucas Halloween gig. The load in was easy except for the hanging 250’s over the railing deal. I love Trademark gigs because the crew is genuine, appreciative, and fair. With other clients, there’s always a feeling that they’re always trying to get the best deal out of their vendors without realizing how those deep discounts affect their vendors.  I think the good folks at TM understand that they can grow WITH their vendors and that in doing so, their vendors will be able to help them out more in the future.

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I guess I haven’t posted since late September. Since then, I’ve worked Symbiosis and Skills LovEvolution Afterparty. Both were pretty cool but stressful at the same time.

I didn’t like Symbiosis for it’s lack of organization and planning on everybody’s part including mine.  Truss wasn’t put together right (in this case it didn’t structurally matter, but it still should have been put together correctly), too much lighting was stuffed onto one static rig, lights were broken, lighting placement wasn’t determined until we were on-site, nobody distributed a show flow, there was no stage plot for each act, lights were hung incorrectly, the party dj rig struggled to cover the basics of a concert rig, none of the 3+ programmers there knew how to fix the iPC screen issue (I called Mitch from HES, and he walked me through it), we had one night to progam for the acts but weren’t told what or where the acts were, and our cabin was maybe 600feet from the all-night-and-day-stage. UGG. Despite these issues, I had a tiny bit of fun and am better for having gone through it. I’ve learned from this gig to ask for a stage plot and lighting requests before programming.

LovEvolution was it’s own beast. Right off the bat, I’ll say I hope to someday be as cool as Mike Ohta, and I’ll leave it at that. Now onto the issues we ran into. Either DaVinci’s 10′ o/d x 12″ x 12″ circle or Duayne’s 12′ o/d x 12″ x 12″ circle was NOT tomcat compatible. Someone botched that. Also, DaVinvi’s circle wasn’t 2″ pipe, so our Megaclaws didn’t fit. What else…. We didn’t have enough3pin, Phoebus’ CF1200’s didn’t like signal from the opto box (but were fine plugged directly into the snake), we had a snafu with the 10′ and 12′ semicircles. We mixed up gear between the outdoor stage and the indoor. We should have not had the 2nd and 3rd tier set up before the riggers got the truss flown. Aside from that, Phil Ho, and Gary (didn’t catch his last name) worked out and through our issues in good stride. I even got an hour to set up my board. Despite the issues, the show turned out great, and nobody else knew or would have know that we had issues, so that was awesome. It was a long day, and I was over it by the time Groove Armada got on.  Again, I’m all the wiser for having gone through it. I even did my first Skills load out. ha!… first time in 4 years?

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So TM’s Lucas Halloween is done, and the real Halloween is on its way. I’ve got Graham’s clift gig, Ruby’s usual par can stuff, and Gus’ Metreon gig this weekend. My only UGH is that nothing has been finalized, and it’s less than a week away.

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New Vectorworks2009 should be arriving tomorrow. I just bought a new Macbook Pro 15″ dual GPU to go with the arkaos and enttec, and I’m getting Vaughnski’s hog1000 today. Fun Fun Fun. Expensive fun.

There’s lots more on the mind, but I gotta run for now.

In recent conversations with wise (and sometimes-wise) folks, it’s becoming clear to me that I’m reaching that point in demand where I can start upping my rate and saying no to people. In order to do a kickass job everytime, I need enough prep time. I think I’ve got enough knowhow to delegating tasks to folks instead of having to do everything myself.

Therein would be a rub. I don’t know anyone worth their salt who will work for the rates my employers have been paying. So this leads me to 2 conclusions:

- 1: I need to find or train someone to become salty

- 2: I need to up my rate  to make price meet demand

I firmly believe that I’ll be okay without either of my current jobs. Conversely, they’d be just fine without me. For the doses of bs that I put up with, my skillset, and the comfort level their constituents have with me, I think they’ll be accommodating to my requests. If not, I’ll spend some time on the road and/or learning new skills. This sounds like a win-win. For one of the jobs, I might be able to price myself out of the BS pool and make it so my time isn’t wasted. Now THAT would be cool…..

Additionally, I was recently introduced to someone that was recommended as a potential protege. I asked him for a resume to tell me what his 1 and 5 year goals are. Hopefully I can work out a plan worthwhile enough for me and him.

First of all, I think I’ve changed in the last 8 years. No duh. But one of the major things is that I used to be so memememememememe. Although I still am, I finally found someone who makes me a better person. I won’t risk the barf factor here, but I will say I can’t imagine coming home to nobody or anybody else.

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As far as work goes, things are still a little tight, but there’s still a hint of light at the end of this tunnel. There are shows right around the bend that need attention, and they’re going to be here before I know it. I NEEED NEED NEEED to be on point.

In non-cryptic news, i just checked out “American Idiot” at the Berkeley Rep Theater, and it was AWESOME. I walked in the theater thinking it was going to be a Green Day concert, but I walked out amazed at the great show and didn’t even think about Green Day. I picked up a few lighting ideas AND a few video ideas, so being there was a green mushroom for me.

—–

The older you get, the faster time goes by, and Fbomb– 2010 is going to be here before I know it. my bday. fresh. sanctuary. mack’s bday. ai afterparty. realbad. symbiosis. skills afterparty. lucashalloween. halloweenclift/ruby/luma. (oooh maybe a breather in november?). lucas holiday. Bebe’s wedding. Christmas. New Year’s.

I’m practically 40 years old already.

maybe i shouldn’t be so blunt or one-sided. i’ve gotta step up my game too.

i just hate dealing with people who think they’re the shit. I think confidence is great, but cockiness –especially if unfounded–  makes people annoying. VERY annoying.

I’ve recently gotten to start playing with my mac-pro, and I’m diggin. I’ve been running ichat, logic pro, firefox, VLC, and other stuff all at the same time without a hiccup. Pretty nice, I must say. It makes me very much resent those tards on the TV ads who go to best buy and buy a vista-laptop. It makes me want to yell.

—–

While on the topic of things that make me want to yell, I’m not feeling so good about a certain situation at the moment. I want to yell at someone at work who while is good-intentioned and talented, needs to fucking get over his fat ego and stop doing things he can’t do.  He signed on to help the company but thus far has created more debt than the company ever had.

I still haven’t completely figured him out yet. It seems like he has a daddy-complex where he has to be the shot caller or the one overseeing everything, but I’m not sure if it’s a ruse so we’ll keep working on him while he gets shows and clients with our resources and then leaves us.

In his mind, he’s solely responsible for the things happening. “I made this happen for you.” “I’ll take care of you.” “I own these fixtures.” “I just bought this gear.” “I pay these guys’ paychecks.” “I brought in $100,000 in sales this month.” “That’s MY client.” No mention is made of who did the actual legwork and support for the show.

When things go wrong on a show he put together or was supposed to oversee, it then turns into we, us, or he. “We lost money.” “He ran the budget over.” “He didn’t listen to me.” “We spent more money than we made on that $100000 show.” “They keep charging my credit card.” “Our client doesn’t have the money yet for the road cases we ordered for him.”

It’s the “I” ’s that scare me, I think. A constant use of “we” makes me think he’s using us and that he’s just going to take and run with the new clients and contacts he’s made while dragging us into the red.

Anyway, I can only do so much bitching. If I keep it up, I might have to  shut up or leave. I’m not 100% sure what to do. Am I wasting my time here?

I guess that’s always the question with everything.

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One thing I was very much looking forward to was obtaining Vectorworks Spotlight 2009, but that’s not going to happen. Nemetschek is going to start doing annual releases of the software title every September, and September 2009 is less than 6 days away. Ugh.

GTG, but before I jet off home, I have to mention youtubing aftereffects tutorials.

what, elation? built-in wireless dmx? HELL YEA! …not that i’ll be able to play with it for a loooonnnnnnggggg time, but industry progress is industry progress.

elation design spot 1200c

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i ordered the arkaos dmx from actlighting today & will probably get it next week. woo hoo! maybe i can figure out how to use my enttec dongle…. heh!

arkaos dmx vj

enttec usb pro

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also really lookin’ to purchase M-Audio’s Axiom49…

axiom49

oi! It would appear I’ve finally gotten around to getting some semblance of a website back up. I’m hoping it’ll help me keep track of my thoughts and goals for the future.

I tried using Joomla, but I was drowning in it, so I took Mane’s recommendation for WordPress. We’ll see how it goes.

I’ve recently moved into a new place with Boyfriend, and I’m enjoying the domestication.

Career-wise, though, I’ve been feeling like I want to move onto other things aside from Rubyskye. It’s a decent, steady, cush job, but sometimes it’s not all about the money. I feel like I can rock any lighting system, so I need another challenge. Maybe video/vj-ing? Maybe music production? Basic photography? I’ve been curious about those other creative aspects for a long while. Maybe going back to school isn’t such a bad idea… architecture? some kind of engineering education?

Coop talked to me about his touring experience and said minimum pay on tours is $2k /week. That’s pretty effing sweet.  I know Boyfriend and the folks at Lumatech won’t like it. I think they’ll make due without me if that’s what I decide I want to do, but I don’t plan on brining it up until I really decide I want to do it.

Well, cheers to getting something done. I’d drink to that, but I’m at work…. story of my life, I suppose.

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